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Posted by hanya on October 15, 2000 at 10:58:43:
In Reply to: Custody laws posted by Rockie on October 14, 2000 at 20:18:41:
: What are Ukrainian laws regarding children of women who marry a foreigner and want to move to their husband's country along with the child? Any help would be greatly appreciated.
I know of one such case, although it was complicated by a divorce. The woman in this case searched for and found another man overseas - a rather wealthy man, and apparently that is what attracted her to him, because she did not speak his language and there could hardly have been any other reason. The father (first husband) was in shock when his wife announced that she was leaving him for a foreigner. Their marriage was a good one, he thought, and there were 2 children involved, and he could not imagine that she would ever wish to separate them from him.
Well, surprise, surprise, she didn't hesitate to insist on taking the children. The fact that she was tearing apart a nuclear family seemed to have little effect on her decision. What to do? After meditating on the situation, and after many consultations with his family and friends, he decided to let them go. Apparently, had he decided to argue in court, it could have turned very messy, and his former wife would not so easily have flown away with the children - and perhaps not at all.
His family's advice was to take the traditional route. In Ukraine, the mother still carries greater weight when it comes to the children. There are also practical considerations - had the children remained in Ukraine with their father, he would have had a more difficult time caring for them. He did not cook. He could not adjust his work schedule to spend more time with them. More responsibility would have turned over to the grandparents, and that would eventually have become an imposition.
Also, the other man was wealthy enough to be able to provide the children with annual tickets to fly home, as well as pay for regular weekly telephone calls.
Topping off the list of pros and cons was the economic factor. In Ukraine, he could not have provided nearly as well for the children as this stranger was promising to do.
Taking all of that into consideration, the father decided not to fight it. In this case, they were all at least somewhat lucky. The children are being well cared for (materially), apparently the wife's material needs are also being satisfied, and the former husband has found a new mate in Ukraine.